Defenition of Sucky 2 -a new hope
*****DEFENITION OF SUCKY 2 -a new hope****Two weeks have passed again and the inevitable happened...I died. Iknow that writing about continual character deaths can seem a bitwhiney, but instead it must be seen more as compiling a list of thingsnot to do. So in this spirit I must continue. Ahem.. "DEFENITION OFSUCKY 2 -a new hope"
*NOTE: please forgive me, I have no spell checker and hate revising.Ye be warned*
As you recall with the previous character, "Not the Mad", the partyhad attacked a 16th level wizard (when I say attacked I really mean"to involk the wrath of").My character died requireing me to roll up a new one to continue thecampain. After the party had fled from the underdark they were in thelong process of resurrecting party members and generally regrouping tomake another assault while in the future avoiding any contact with16th level wizards. Gazgrim the Half-Orc barbarian and Gronk a stonegiant fighter (what a pair they make) were busy cutting down trees forsome reason. When suddenly they heard a sound. My new character heardthis sound aswell and charged into the forest towards the noise.Gazgrim and Gronk were caught in shock as a Gigantic beastie with 10arms with 10 swords, consequently 10 attacks, appeared infront of themwith a poof of highly dramatic smoke (pause for gasps and screems) "Mymaster sends me with greetings and a message" it said as it grinedwickedly. Meanwhile My new character (to be deatailed in 30 words)charged through completely buck naked in all his majesty. "Don'tworry, I'll protect you!" The naked guy said, and charged the ghastlymonster without wielding any weapons himself.You see, My character is a monk. I had shown up on Thursday withpre-rolled stats and the idea of being a monk. I was told to fill thecharacter sheet up to an 8th level char but when I got there I wasinformed by the Gm and one of the players that they had beendiscussing possibilities of giving me a break. They had decided thatas long as I agreed to enter the game with no equipment what so everthat I could be 9th level instead of 8th. I smirked slightly thoughenough for them to ask "what?" I proceeded to tell them that I haddecided to be a monk and so had no use for any equipment at all andwould gladly accept their proposal. This in turn recieved groans androlled eyes as a responce.7th char- Yune Chow Wah of the Old order. (9th level Nudie Monk) Thischar had pretty good stats, and I know what your saying..."How couldit have good stats considering that its your character?" "Well," I say"these good stats were graciously rolled by my fiance who had managedin the past to randomly roll up maxed stats for every stat on onecharacter." Being a monk he then had an unarmored AC of 19 (20 ifusing dodge) and many feats for unarmed attacks and grappling. Anyway,on to the story.This strangely naked guy ran up to this monstrosity and attacked. Irolled a 19 (Wow) +8 attack bonus = 27. So the monk channeled all hisenergy into this one attack and threw his most powerful punch andstruck the beastie with all he was worth....a resounding "piff" soundcould be heared as the blow connected, for as fist hit flesh, fistbouced off flesh and did no damage what so ever. Now, I'm not one tobe a spoiled sport but in this case I decided to take my balls and gohome. Thats right, I put all the combined knowledge of my previouscharacters into play and booked it. What else could I have done? Onlyrolling a 20 would have hit and for me thats, well, still a 1 in 20chance. But, if you believe in luck, mojo, or karma then the chance isworse for me, I swear. So my movement rate is 60 because i'm a monkand I'm hightailing it out of combat when the monster summoned anotherone of itself directly in my path. I would have peed my pants had Ibeen wearing any and did a quadruple move in the oposit directiontowards town. I broke through the forest out into the town and shoutedfor any able body men to follow me into the forest. A smirk and achuckle later I added, "Some people are under attack in there by ademon.... REALLY!" So back through the forest I ran with anyone crazyenough to follow a naked guy into the forest muttering something aboutattacking a demon with 10 arms each wielding a sword. (are there suchpeople?) When I broke through the clearing I saw that the monsterapparently had been defeated or had dissapeared. (more likelydissapeared because how could it have been destroyed if I theMAGNIFICENT NUDIE MONK had been unable to harm it.) We enchagedpleasentries and the generous half-orc offered to make me a loin clothout of some pelts he could round up (squirrels) I said sure noproblem. "Jus watch yer self" He said, "For dose tings I 'ear ave anafinity to bite nuts. Huh. Huh. Huh." After this, (another quiteamusing intro to the group. I like em, can ya tell?) The newly formedparty, now looks more like a freek show than any kind of organizedgroup. Half-orc, stone giant, naked guy, 2 elves, a priest of Kossoth(human but still strange), and some odd Underdark critter with no nosethat hunts mind flayers. We decide to go back to the Underdark. (Wejust don't learn) While there, we were confronted by a lesser wizardwho claimed he was the apprentice of the Archwizard who had graciouslyalowed some of the party to survive. he said that all the apprenticeswant the Archwizard dead and so gave us the password to get past allthe warning spells that would aleart the wizard to our comming. Notknowing what it was like to be killed twice by the same guy we agreedto attack the 16th level wizard again. (probably 17th now because ofthe exp he got for whoopin us) So we spend the evening memorizingspells that would aid us in the comming battle. The next day we passall the warning spells and reach the corridor before the mages room.We cast all our spells to beef ourself up. I now have an AC of 25 (26with dodge) and I'm silenced so that I can grapple him and disable hisspell casting abilities (you know the ones without the silenced spellfeat that he has) We burst open the door to his throne roomdramatically and charged in for the attack. We were confronted with abarrage of zip, nada, bumpkis. He wasn't there. Poo. But wait.... thedoor to the left was left slightly ajar. (ignoring the ajar joke) wecrept cautiously, forgetting about the silence cast around me, andentered the room. The wizard was lying asleep in his bed. The firstplan was for me to jump on him and grapple while the others pummledhim. But, we had a better and yet somehow worse idea. Why not justCoup de Gras him? Lop his f-ing head off. *cackle* So, Gronk walked upcautiously, looked away and winced, and broght his axe down cleanlyseparating the wizards head from his body. NO! It couldn't have beenthat easy! We chopped him up and burned the corpse, all the whilestill fearing that the wizard had parhaps switched bodies somehow orcould strike at us somehow beyond the grave. The moral of the storywithin the story is... How do you kill a 16th or parhaps 17th levelwizard? Silenced and in his sleep like the cowards that you are. Now,I said that it was both a good and a bad idea. Good -he's dead / Bad-his exp worth is 0 because he was asleep. So we continue on into theUnderdark. A few Drow here, some undead wierdos there, and we end uptraveling down a tunnel. I was following the rule "Be niether first,nor last." which left me in the middle. We heard a rumbling. Well...They heard a rumbling I was contemplating the quality of my squirrelpelt loin cloth apparently. Suddenly a Gargantuin purple worm burstthrough the tunnel wall and attacked. Who it attacked was not the gm'sfault. He rolled randomly and the gods of luck decided to put the wormdirectly next to me. (its always good to know who to blame so that youdick punch the right person) The worm attacked me, Brand asked if a 36hit me. I said no but crumpled under the the scary glare of the Gm, (ibelieve its a gaze attack as a special ability given under theirprestiege class) I said "Well, I have an AC of 19. 20 if I dodged. CanI dodge?" Brand said, "Ok so you take 20 points of damage, And... rolla grapple check" I rolled and just as I was about to look at thenumber Brand said "Can you beat a 48?" Hmm, lets see shall we. Irolled an 2 (duh) BUT I have +8 to my grapple roll. Now I haven't beenin a math class in several years but I still think that my combinedroll of 14 is a bit shy of 48. The worm proceeded to eat me. Brandreassured me that I wasn't dead, I was just inside the gut of a worm.Kinda like Bobafet and didn't he escape somehow in the books? So I hadhope, 2 rounds of hope, but it was there. All the other people wereattacking it and doing massive damage, till it reached the worms turnagain. Brand said, "You take another.... 20 points of damage." I'm ok.Got 6hp left but I'm ok. Got one round of hope left. People werehacking away at it. Some other people who were the round before hadpulled out daggers and were trying to open up their own way out of theworm. I, having no dagger or equipment of any kind, still attemptedvaliently to punch the innards of the worm. Wow! rolled a natural 20,a threat. Crossed fingers turns out to be a jinx by the way, becausemy next roll was a 1. Well, at least it was a hit. And I did awhopping 4 (rolled a 2+2) points of damage to boot. The other peopleoutside continued to do damage, a melfs acid arrow here, lightiningbold there, and a couple of regular ass kickings. Then came the worm'sturn again. Brand said, "Ok now take...18 points of crushing damageand 2 points of acid damage. I don't think I could have stretched my6hp enough to cover that much hurt so I gave up the ghost and becameworm food. (I had asked if a really dirty naked monk would have madethe worm sick enough to throw me up, He chuckled and said no. Ian (thespirit of Gazgrim) said nice try but the acid would sterilize you.)Dying wasn't bad this time but the kicker came next after the wormdelt damage to those inside. The worm took a 5ft shuffle, over exerteditself causing it to take 1hp of damage, and died. No Freekin way! Ishit you not. 1hp. I said well... look at the time. I have to getgoing, I went downstairs and told my fiance that it was time to go.She said "why so early?" "I died again as I told you I would earlier"I said. She, being the compassionate person she is (and cute) said"Poor Drew" in that tone that makes everything alright. Then she said"We can leave in about 15 minutes I want to finish watching my show."(figures) I looked up at the TV and saw that the girls were watchingsome strange show about bras etc. A quick turn of the heel, a coupleof stairs, and I back up in the gaming room talking with the guys.Becca came up the stairs later, once her show was done, and said "He(Brand) should really see the rant." (meaning my small note aboutthings that suck) "No, its ok." I said (which translates from Drewspeak as "Oh for the love of God no" or alternitivly "For the sake ofall that is holy I beg of you to say nothing" either would do) Therant was the likes of which that was meant to be a joke sent to afriend who is also a Gm (and a good one I hear) that I told I washaving bad luck to. Hence, contained endeering terms towards the Gmsuch as "the Gm of antifun" and "Mr. Crappy pants" I wasn't sure howhe would take them and was nervous. But, Becca, the wonderful personthat she is, gave him the URL of the "rant" and he proceeded to readit aloud. The story seemed to involk laughter all around. I figuredthey all had a really good sense of humour but sometimes you can neverreally tell. Ian (Gazgrim) said "In light of the rant I think thatDrew should come in as level 10 instead of level 9" They all agreed.From this reaction I assumed they liked it and took it as it wasmeant. (I was still alive at least -another good sign.) Well all'swell that ends well I suppose or alternitivly, bitch and ye shallrecieve. Just kidding. In either case that still leaves me with theneed of rolling up a new char. I'm not sure what I should be next.Parhaps I have experienced enough character classes to invent my ownclass. Nah, I probably would have a desire to make something thatwould unbalance the game unacceptably for the other characters (Iwould be perfectly comfortable gaining +4 to each stat per level andgod like powers. Hey parhaps I should Gm). Parhaps I could make acharacter based upon me, Cleric 3/Mage 3/Figher 4 or some such thing.
But that is a decision that doesn't have to be made right now. Later,you know, when I'm not pissing my time away on the internet.
Posted by drew at November 7, 2003 01:31 AM
*NOTE: please forgive me, I have no spell checker and hate revising.Ye be warned*
As you recall with the previous character, "Not the Mad", the partyhad attacked a 16th level wizard (when I say attacked I really mean"to involk the wrath of").My character died requireing me to roll up a new one to continue thecampain. After the party had fled from the underdark they were in thelong process of resurrecting party members and generally regrouping tomake another assault while in the future avoiding any contact with16th level wizards. Gazgrim the Half-Orc barbarian and Gronk a stonegiant fighter (what a pair they make) were busy cutting down trees forsome reason. When suddenly they heard a sound. My new character heardthis sound aswell and charged into the forest towards the noise.Gazgrim and Gronk were caught in shock as a Gigantic beastie with 10arms with 10 swords, consequently 10 attacks, appeared infront of themwith a poof of highly dramatic smoke (pause for gasps and screems) "Mymaster sends me with greetings and a message" it said as it grinedwickedly. Meanwhile My new character (to be deatailed in 30 words)charged through completely buck naked in all his majesty. "Don'tworry, I'll protect you!" The naked guy said, and charged the ghastlymonster without wielding any weapons himself.You see, My character is a monk. I had shown up on Thursday withpre-rolled stats and the idea of being a monk. I was told to fill thecharacter sheet up to an 8th level char but when I got there I wasinformed by the Gm and one of the players that they had beendiscussing possibilities of giving me a break. They had decided thatas long as I agreed to enter the game with no equipment what so everthat I could be 9th level instead of 8th. I smirked slightly thoughenough for them to ask "what?" I proceeded to tell them that I haddecided to be a monk and so had no use for any equipment at all andwould gladly accept their proposal. This in turn recieved groans androlled eyes as a responce.7th char- Yune Chow Wah of the Old order. (9th level Nudie Monk) Thischar had pretty good stats, and I know what your saying..."How couldit have good stats considering that its your character?" "Well," I say"these good stats were graciously rolled by my fiance who had managedin the past to randomly roll up maxed stats for every stat on onecharacter." Being a monk he then had an unarmored AC of 19 (20 ifusing dodge) and many feats for unarmed attacks and grappling. Anyway,on to the story.This strangely naked guy ran up to this monstrosity and attacked. Irolled a 19 (Wow) +8 attack bonus = 27. So the monk channeled all hisenergy into this one attack and threw his most powerful punch andstruck the beastie with all he was worth....a resounding "piff" soundcould be heared as the blow connected, for as fist hit flesh, fistbouced off flesh and did no damage what so ever. Now, I'm not one tobe a spoiled sport but in this case I decided to take my balls and gohome. Thats right, I put all the combined knowledge of my previouscharacters into play and booked it. What else could I have done? Onlyrolling a 20 would have hit and for me thats, well, still a 1 in 20chance. But, if you believe in luck, mojo, or karma then the chance isworse for me, I swear. So my movement rate is 60 because i'm a monkand I'm hightailing it out of combat when the monster summoned anotherone of itself directly in my path. I would have peed my pants had Ibeen wearing any and did a quadruple move in the oposit directiontowards town. I broke through the forest out into the town and shoutedfor any able body men to follow me into the forest. A smirk and achuckle later I added, "Some people are under attack in there by ademon.... REALLY!" So back through the forest I ran with anyone crazyenough to follow a naked guy into the forest muttering something aboutattacking a demon with 10 arms each wielding a sword. (are there suchpeople?) When I broke through the clearing I saw that the monsterapparently had been defeated or had dissapeared. (more likelydissapeared because how could it have been destroyed if I theMAGNIFICENT NUDIE MONK had been unable to harm it.) We enchagedpleasentries and the generous half-orc offered to make me a loin clothout of some pelts he could round up (squirrels) I said sure noproblem. "Jus watch yer self" He said, "For dose tings I 'ear ave anafinity to bite nuts. Huh. Huh. Huh." After this, (another quiteamusing intro to the group. I like em, can ya tell?) The newly formedparty, now looks more like a freek show than any kind of organizedgroup. Half-orc, stone giant, naked guy, 2 elves, a priest of Kossoth(human but still strange), and some odd Underdark critter with no nosethat hunts mind flayers. We decide to go back to the Underdark. (Wejust don't learn) While there, we were confronted by a lesser wizardwho claimed he was the apprentice of the Archwizard who had graciouslyalowed some of the party to survive. he said that all the apprenticeswant the Archwizard dead and so gave us the password to get past allthe warning spells that would aleart the wizard to our comming. Notknowing what it was like to be killed twice by the same guy we agreedto attack the 16th level wizard again. (probably 17th now because ofthe exp he got for whoopin us) So we spend the evening memorizingspells that would aid us in the comming battle. The next day we passall the warning spells and reach the corridor before the mages room.We cast all our spells to beef ourself up. I now have an AC of 25 (26with dodge) and I'm silenced so that I can grapple him and disable hisspell casting abilities (you know the ones without the silenced spellfeat that he has) We burst open the door to his throne roomdramatically and charged in for the attack. We were confronted with abarrage of zip, nada, bumpkis. He wasn't there. Poo. But wait.... thedoor to the left was left slightly ajar. (ignoring the ajar joke) wecrept cautiously, forgetting about the silence cast around me, andentered the room. The wizard was lying asleep in his bed. The firstplan was for me to jump on him and grapple while the others pummledhim. But, we had a better and yet somehow worse idea. Why not justCoup de Gras him? Lop his f-ing head off. *cackle* So, Gronk walked upcautiously, looked away and winced, and broght his axe down cleanlyseparating the wizards head from his body. NO! It couldn't have beenthat easy! We chopped him up and burned the corpse, all the whilestill fearing that the wizard had parhaps switched bodies somehow orcould strike at us somehow beyond the grave. The moral of the storywithin the story is... How do you kill a 16th or parhaps 17th levelwizard? Silenced and in his sleep like the cowards that you are. Now,I said that it was both a good and a bad idea. Good -he's dead / Bad-his exp worth is 0 because he was asleep. So we continue on into theUnderdark. A few Drow here, some undead wierdos there, and we end uptraveling down a tunnel. I was following the rule "Be niether first,nor last." which left me in the middle. We heard a rumbling. Well...They heard a rumbling I was contemplating the quality of my squirrelpelt loin cloth apparently. Suddenly a Gargantuin purple worm burstthrough the tunnel wall and attacked. Who it attacked was not the gm'sfault. He rolled randomly and the gods of luck decided to put the wormdirectly next to me. (its always good to know who to blame so that youdick punch the right person) The worm attacked me, Brand asked if a 36hit me. I said no but crumpled under the the scary glare of the Gm, (ibelieve its a gaze attack as a special ability given under theirprestiege class) I said "Well, I have an AC of 19. 20 if I dodged. CanI dodge?" Brand said, "Ok so you take 20 points of damage, And... rolla grapple check" I rolled and just as I was about to look at thenumber Brand said "Can you beat a 48?" Hmm, lets see shall we. Irolled an 2 (duh) BUT I have +8 to my grapple roll. Now I haven't beenin a math class in several years but I still think that my combinedroll of 14 is a bit shy of 48. The worm proceeded to eat me. Brandreassured me that I wasn't dead, I was just inside the gut of a worm.Kinda like Bobafet and didn't he escape somehow in the books? So I hadhope, 2 rounds of hope, but it was there. All the other people wereattacking it and doing massive damage, till it reached the worms turnagain. Brand said, "You take another.... 20 points of damage." I'm ok.Got 6hp left but I'm ok. Got one round of hope left. People werehacking away at it. Some other people who were the round before hadpulled out daggers and were trying to open up their own way out of theworm. I, having no dagger or equipment of any kind, still attemptedvaliently to punch the innards of the worm. Wow! rolled a natural 20,a threat. Crossed fingers turns out to be a jinx by the way, becausemy next roll was a 1. Well, at least it was a hit. And I did awhopping 4 (rolled a 2+2) points of damage to boot. The other peopleoutside continued to do damage, a melfs acid arrow here, lightiningbold there, and a couple of regular ass kickings. Then came the worm'sturn again. Brand said, "Ok now take...18 points of crushing damageand 2 points of acid damage. I don't think I could have stretched my6hp enough to cover that much hurt so I gave up the ghost and becameworm food. (I had asked if a really dirty naked monk would have madethe worm sick enough to throw me up, He chuckled and said no. Ian (thespirit of Gazgrim) said nice try but the acid would sterilize you.)Dying wasn't bad this time but the kicker came next after the wormdelt damage to those inside. The worm took a 5ft shuffle, over exerteditself causing it to take 1hp of damage, and died. No Freekin way! Ishit you not. 1hp. I said well... look at the time. I have to getgoing, I went downstairs and told my fiance that it was time to go.She said "why so early?" "I died again as I told you I would earlier"I said. She, being the compassionate person she is (and cute) said"Poor Drew" in that tone that makes everything alright. Then she said"We can leave in about 15 minutes I want to finish watching my show."(figures) I looked up at the TV and saw that the girls were watchingsome strange show about bras etc. A quick turn of the heel, a coupleof stairs, and I back up in the gaming room talking with the guys.Becca came up the stairs later, once her show was done, and said "He(Brand) should really see the rant." (meaning my small note aboutthings that suck) "No, its ok." I said (which translates from Drewspeak as "Oh for the love of God no" or alternitivly "For the sake ofall that is holy I beg of you to say nothing" either would do) Therant was the likes of which that was meant to be a joke sent to afriend who is also a Gm (and a good one I hear) that I told I washaving bad luck to. Hence, contained endeering terms towards the Gmsuch as "the Gm of antifun" and "Mr. Crappy pants" I wasn't sure howhe would take them and was nervous. But, Becca, the wonderful personthat she is, gave him the URL of the "rant" and he proceeded to readit aloud. The story seemed to involk laughter all around. I figuredthey all had a really good sense of humour but sometimes you can neverreally tell. Ian (Gazgrim) said "In light of the rant I think thatDrew should come in as level 10 instead of level 9" They all agreed.From this reaction I assumed they liked it and took it as it wasmeant. (I was still alive at least -another good sign.) Well all'swell that ends well I suppose or alternitivly, bitch and ye shallrecieve. Just kidding. In either case that still leaves me with theneed of rolling up a new char. I'm not sure what I should be next.Parhaps I have experienced enough character classes to invent my ownclass. Nah, I probably would have a desire to make something thatwould unbalance the game unacceptably for the other characters (Iwould be perfectly comfortable gaining +4 to each stat per level andgod like powers. Hey parhaps I should Gm). Parhaps I could make acharacter based upon me, Cleric 3/Mage 3/Figher 4 or some such thing.
But that is a decision that doesn't have to be made right now. Later,you know, when I'm not pissing my time away on the internet.
Posted by drew at November 7, 2003 01:31 AM
posted by Merther at 4:06 PM
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